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In this episode, we listen to persuasive words, as portrayed in Sangam Literary work, Kurunthogai 212, penned by Neythal Kaarkiyaar. The verse is situated in the coastal regions of ‘Neythal’ and speaks in the voice of the confidante to the lady, bringing a request to tryst from the man.
கொண்கன் ஊர்ந்த கொடுஞ்சி நெடுந் தேர்
தெண் கடல் அடை கரைத் தெளிர்மணி ஒலிப்ப,
காண வந்து, நாணப் பெயரும்;
அளிதோ தானே, காமம்
விளிவதுமன்ற; நோகோ யானே.
‘Alas, he parts away disappointed’ laments a voice in this verse. The opening words ‘கொண்கன் ஊர்ந்த கொடுஞ்சி நெடுந் தேர்’ pack within a portrait of the man’s vehicle, for it means ‘the tall chariot with a staff on which the lord of the shores rides’. Let us focus a little more on this word ‘கொடுஞ்சி’. This word is said to represent a staff in front of a chariot rider’s seat, shaped like a lotus, which the rider holds on, for support. Moving on, we glimpse elements in this setting in ‘தெண் கடல் அடை கரை’ meaning ‘sand-filled shore of the sea with clear waters’. The rhythmic verse ‘காண வந்து நாணப் பெயரும்’ meaning ‘coming to see and parting to shame’ seems like a cryptic commentary about an action. Ending with the words ‘நோகோ யானே’ meaning ‘I suffer a lot’, the verse evokes our empathy.
Why should a chariot’s coming and going evoke so much reaction? The context reveals that the man had met the lady and fallen in love with her. As custom dictated then, he seeks the confidante’s help to further his relationship with the lady. After a lot of struggle, he manages to convince her and the confidante decides to help him in his intention to tryst with the lady. So, she goes to the lady and says, “The lord of the shores rides a tall chariot with a lotus-shaped staff. Making the shore bordering those clear waters resound with tinkling bells, the lord arrives on his chariot to see and parts away, leaving us in shame. Pitiable indeed for love to be quelled thus. I suffer when I think about it.” With these words, the confidante tries to persuade the lady by stressing what a tragedy it is, for love to be unrequited.
Time to explore the nuances in this tiny verse. The first thing the confidante talks about is the man’s tall chariot with the adornment of a lotus-shaped staff. She adds saying that as the man rides this chariot by the clear seas, the sand-filled shore resounds with the sound of those bells. It sounds like a jubilant scene! However, the confidante says ‘no’ to our inference by indicating that the man comes with a desire to see but he parts, leaving them in shame. Why should they be in shame? Let’s wait a while to answer that. Concluding with the words that it’s heartbreaking when love is not fulfilled, the confidante says that she suffers because of the events around her.
Isn’t this a curious state of a friend being laden with so much work in bringing two people together? Customs of the past are bewildering to us, the descendants. Getting back to the ‘shame’ statement in question, on reflecting, it becomes clear that it was perceived as a thing of shame to let a lord leave in a dejected manner, with his mission unfulfilled. The confidante tries to subtly introduce the thought that the lady should not refuse the man in any case. These notions must not be seen with the eyes of the ‘now’. It was how a man’s love was portrayed then and the seeming duty of the lady to accept it, whereas now, a woman is no longer bound by the chains of what society says and it’s her right to refuse, if she so thinks. Indeed, as the confidante concludes there is sadness in love being refused and we have surely come to a point where we can empathise with the hurt a person feels, without changing how we feel about them. And yet again, an ancient verse makes us ponder on the nuances of accepting and rejecting love!
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