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In this episode, we listen to an instance of tactful refusal and skilful persuasion, as depicted in Sangam Literary work, Kurunthogai 336, penned by Kundriyanaar. Set in the coastal regions of ‘Neythal’, the verse speaks in the voice of the confidante to the man, questioning his intention to tryst with the lady by night, in a thoughtful way.
செறுவர்க்கு உவகை ஆக, தெறுவர
ஈங்கனம் வருபவோ? தேம்பாய் துறைவ!
சிறு நா ஒண் மணி விளரி ஆர்ப்பக்
கடு மா நெடுந்தேர் நேமி போகிய
இருங்கழி நெய்தல் போல,
வருந்தினள் அளியள், நீ பிரிந்திசினோளே.
‘Would anyone do such a thing’ is the core question here. The opening words ‘செறுவர்க்கு உவகை ஆக’ meaning ‘as delight to enemies’ portrays some action that would bring much happiness to one’s opponents and makes us wonder what it means. In ‘தேம்பாய் துறைவ’, the beautiful land of the protagonist is described, for it means ‘the shores where honey flows’. A sweet land indeed! The phrase ‘கடு மா நெடுந்தேர் நேமி’ meaning ‘the wheel of a tall chariot with speeding horses’ paints a dynamic image of a vehicle in motion. Beauty metre of this verse soars when we sight ‘இருங்கழி நெய்தல்’ meaning ‘the blue lotus in the backwaters’. Ending with the words ‘நீ பிரிந்திசினோளே’ meaning ‘she, the one whom you parted from’, the verse symbolises a woman as a recipient of the listener’s actions and intrigues our curiosity.
What do rushing wheels and blooming buds have to do with the lady? The context reveals that the man and lady were leading a love relationship and the man was trysting by day with the lady for some time. After a while, when the man conveys his interest to tryst with the lady by night, the confidante tells him, “Bringing joy to enemies and worry to us, will anyone come in this manner, O lord of the honey-flowing shores? As small-tongued, clear bells resound with ‘Vilari’ melody, the wheel of the tall chariot, tied with speeding horses, crushes the blue lotus in the dark backwaters. Akin to that faded flower, she worries. To be pitied is she, the one whom you parted with.” With these words, the confidante tells the man in a gentle manner that trysting with the lady by night is not a sound idea and that instead he must seek the lady’s hand in marriage.
Time to explore the nuances. The confidante starts by talking about how the man’s coming at night is sure to bring much joy to those who dislike him and much sorrow to the lady. What could be the meaning of this cryptic statement? It’s the dangers of traveling at night that the confidante implies. If the man is weakened by these dangers, that would make his enemies delight, and at the same time, if anything were to happen to him, the lady would be distraught. It’s these contrasting images that the confidante instills in the man’s mind by asking would anyone do such a thing. Then, she goes on to talk about how the bells in the man’s chariot resound with the ‘Vilari’ melody. Scholars tell us that this particular melody could be a tune evoking a melancholy mood. Setting up the background score, the confidante then talks about how the wheels of the same chariot, pulled by strong horses, step on a blue lotus flower on the path. Just like how that tattered flower would feel, the lady feels, the confidante says, and concludes that this poor lady, whom the man parts away with, after his trysts, is to be pitied.
Within that question and simile, the confidante packs a kind refusal and a strong suggestion. The question reveals the concern for the man’s safety and in that image of the wilting blue lotus flower, the man’s thoughtlessness in sticking to temporary pleasures is brought to the fore. Realising his folly, the man would no doubt take steps to seek the lady’s hand in marriage. An excellent lesson in thoughtfully refusing a person’s request and pointing them in the right path!
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